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Most Days, I’m Little Two Eyes
My favorite fairy tale came from a worn book on my grandmother’s bookshelf: “Little Two Eyes” by Grimm Brothers. There was once a woman who had three daughters, of whom the eldest was named ‘One Eye,’...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 484: The Screaming Bridge
“Barf me out!” Heather yelled. “This van smells like ALF farts!” When I was 10 my family picked up everything and moved from Dallas to a little community outside of Mt. Pleasant, Texas. We went from a...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 483: Fighting Coyotes
“Mommy! Mommy! Come quick!” yelled Micah. That can’t be good. We’ve only been back from the ER for 2 hours! (Maddox, my 2-year-old son, failed to establish a new summit atop Great-Grandma Cookie’s...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 482: Livin’ on a Prayer
“We’re in Paris, people,” Valerie said. “Let’s go dancing!” “Yeah!” I agreed – as I checked the watch I wasn’t wearing and then casually pretended I was just inspecting a freckle. Obviously, we’d been...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 481: Finding a Good Seat
I was so hungry I could’ve eaten the beans from my bean bag chair. Instead, I opted for two plates of spaghetti and a bowl of Lucky Charms. “How was the first day of school, Sweetheart?” my father...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 480: I am Laura Holt
My happy place on Monday nights in 1987 was on the couch with my mother watching Pierce Brosnan – I mean “Remington Steele.” (Insert audible sigh here.) For you youngsters, Remington Steele was...
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Butterscotch Moment No. 479: Going Bonkers
“I told you I don’t know where your Scooby-Doo Fred doll is!” I yelled to Micah, as I vacuumed crackers off the couch. “Stop yelling at me Mommy!” “She’s not yelling at you, Micah,” Barrett said in my...
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Butterscotch Moment 478: Last Lines
Claude and Barry sat across from me in a booth at our favorite sandwich shop. Law school exams weren’t far off so that meant long days and nights at the library interrupted by short breaks of...
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Butterscotch Moment 477: Cheap Shoes & Motorcycles
College students entered the empty house through the massive mahogany front doors. I stood with Angela, a fellow wallflower, and watched the frat guys with their bowl cuts trying to impress the girls...
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Butterscotch Moment 476: Popeye the Sailor Man
Growing up, my grandfather “Popeye,” was the most fascinating person I knew. He’d briefly run away on a train when he was 15 – just for kicks. Had falsified his age to join the Navy and shot down bad...
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Butterscotch Moment 475: Those Lips
The steady beep, beep, beep of the monitors had a certain hypnotic effect. My gaze slowly drifted from the dimpled ceiling to the lima-bean-green curtains that hid the unconscious old lady in the bed...
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MUD MILE: CHAPTER ONE
“We’re born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.” At least that’s what I overheard the Gas-N-Dogs clerk tell his acne-faced apprentice. I guess he grew up on Mud Mile, too. Don’t get me...
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Butterscotch Moment 474: Dreams Change
I blame Charlotte Brontë. Growing up, when I dreamed about who I’d grow old with, I’d picture a tall, handsome, mysterious man. He’d have dark eyes and careless hair. He’d be brilliant in the mornings....
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Butterscotch Moment 73: Song of Solomon
“Sis, you should take a look at this,” my brother said, glancing back and forth between me, the Bible, and the small group of people gathered in the pews. “I think you’ve got the wrong verse in the...
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Butterscotch Moment 72: Mrs. Keanu Reeves
I pinched my nose and whispered so the taxi driver couldn’t hear. “Either this taxi needs a bath or there’s a chicken-fried steak hidden under the seat.” “Yeah, yeah,” Ashley laughed. “Where are you?”...
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Butterscotch Moment 71: Wedding Colors
One of my best friends gets married in two weeks. Considering the time, energy, and jaw-dropping amount of money that goes into a wedding, it’s understandable she wants every detail to be just right....
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Butterscotch Moment 70: Bullet The Blue Sky
Bored of the typical NYC martini-crowd, I’d convinced my boss Mike to join Barrett and me in Soho for the U2 tribute band, “You Also.” When you saw Barrett strolling down the street, you’d say to...
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